Hearst Castle "The Enchanted Hill"

I've long heard of Hearst Castle but never quite got the interest nor opportunity to visit until last weekend. I guess there's some truth in that when you live like you're dying, you really seize all the time you have. I have exactly 31 days to leaving the USA and I'm just trying my best to maximize my experience, particularly the weekends.

So last Saturday, Jennifer and I headed to Hearst Castle at 7am from Santa Monica. The castle was a mix of historic architectural styles that William Randolph Hearst admired in his travels around Europe when his mom brought him on a 1 year tour when he was 10 years old.

I learned a couple of things in this trip - besides learning about European architecture-

Lesson #1: If I ever have my old kid(s), I will definitely want to bring them on an extended trip to open their eyes to the world. Maybe something like a decadent decade experience every 10 years.

10 years old - when kids are soaking in the world

20 years old - when kids are still in college and willing to stick with you

30 years old - when kids are possibly newly married/ setting up their own family

40 years old - when they can bring their kids and I get to travel with my grandchildren

50 years old - when this is possibly my last big trip with them before the realities of life (aging) takes its toll

I recall how a portfolio manager and his family lives not in a mansion but in a boat in Hong Kong, and then the same one in Singapore. He related that the kids have learned so much about life - teamwork, communication, compromise, family support etc. in a small cabin space. They then sail around the world on their boat - very cool right? :)

Some of the A-list guests in Hearst's days consisted of Hollywood and political elite like Charlie Chaplin, Franklin Roosevelt and Winston Churchill. But after Hearst passed away, Hearst Corp donated the estate to the State of California and millions of people have visited Hearst Castle every year.

Lesson #2: Dreams are meant to be shared. Dreams also do come true if you work hard enough for it.

Given that we were not that far from the famous PCH elephant seals, we drove to let Jennifer catch a glimpse of these huge seals! The first time I saw them was when I went for the Gilroy Garlic Festival - never thought I'd get a chance to come back again. It's a really nice feeling. :)

Then we stumbled upon another nice discovery! The World Famous Pea Soup Place! lol.

Surprise begets surprises. We then stumbled upon another really cool place! Solvang- the Danish Capital of the USA, as I later wikipedia-ed and discovered!

Given that most shops have already closed by the time we got there (6+pm), I'll probably want to go back again in the day time if there's a chance and try the Danish pastries, Belgium waffles etc. haha....byebye organic detox!! lol.

Live Like You're Dying - Who do you think of when you hear this song?

Live Like We're Dying Lyrics

Sometimes we fall down, can't get back up
We're hiding behind skin that's too tough
How come we don't say I love you enough
Till it's to late, it's not too late

Our hearts are hungry for a food that won't come
And we could make a feast from these crumbs
And we're all staring down the barrel of a gun
So if your life flashed before you,
What would you wish you would've done

Yeah, we gotta start
Looking at the hands of the time we've been given
If this is all we got and we gotta start thinking
If every second counts on a clock that's ticking
Gotta live like we're dying

[ Chorus: // We only got 86,400 seconds in a day to

Turn it all around or to throw it all away
We gotta tell them that we love them
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we're dying // ]

And if your plane fell out of the skies
Who would you call with your last goodbye
Should be so careful who we live out our lives
So when we long for absolution,
There'll no one on the line, yeah

Yeah, we gotta start
Looking at the hands of the time we've been given
If this is all we got and we gotta start thinking
If every second counts on a clock that's ticking
Gotta live like we're dying

[Chorus]

Like we're dying, oh, like we're dying..

[Chorus]

You never know a good thing till it's gone
You never see a crash till it's head on
Why do we think we're right when we're dead wrong
You never know a good thing till it's gone

Yeah, we gotta start
Looking at the hands of the time we've been given
If this is all we got and we gotta start thinking
If every second counts on a clock that's ticking
Gotta live like we're dying

[Chorus]

Like we're dying, oh, like we're dying..

[Chorus]

Malibu // Career advice 101

Just had dinner with GCD at Gladstone, Malibu - a seafood place perched on the beach in Malibu. Lobsters, shrimps, mussels, calamari, fish, cerviche, oysters (yes, I finally had my 2nd raw oyster and actually liked it!), gosh - it was a feast. Bad for my organic detox, but more than a feast for the belly, it was a feast for the brain.

It's at times like this (which happens so often here in my company) that I feel like all the trials and struggles I've been through are worth it. There's so many outstanding people here at work whom I've known and learned so much from that I've also hopefully matured into a better person over the past 2 years.

Career advice 101:

1) Always look for what you are good at, instead of thinking of where's the best place to be at

2) Never stop learning: the day you're not learning enough, ask for/ make a change

3) Look for ways to cross-pollinate and add value, think of your competition and look for ways to differentiate yourself

4) To develop, think growth, not costs - don't develop the Post Office Syndrome (getting trapped in silly policies)

5) Use analogies to communicate ideas - E.g. Co. as the Big Tanker - slow but powerful, massive hiring as drinking 8 shots of vodka - you feel great while at it but have a terrible hangover thereafter

Southern California (SoCal) really is a wonderful place and I'm so lucky to be living a few blocks from the wonderful Santa Monica beach/pier. I know I'll look back on my life years down the road and be grateful that I took up this challenge... even though I admit that the journey's not been easy and life's been fairly lonely...

Anyway, I always try to make the best of everything. So when Jason came, we took the chance to soak in as much beauty as we can. We visited Zuma beach, one of the top beaches in Malibu and the Leo Carillo beach (SoCal's #1 beach with amazing tidepools, sea caves, dramatic cliffs and sheer beauty) -

Given that it was Father's Day, my sister/previous landlord Maria invited me over to her place to celebrate Father's Day in what was a surprise party for Jack. Suddenly, life doesn't seem so bad. ;)

Friends are Friends forever. Congratulations LPY!

I'm an uber loyal person, and like to think of myself as a pretty good friend. But in recent days, I've been reminded how fortunate I am to have very loyal, amazing friends too - dear blessings who take the time to stay in touch. :)

My darlings - Yes, we'll make our Sex & The City dream vacation happen!

Jiemei - Happy Birthday! We're far apart but I really do feel close to you at heart! Sworn too, and your reminiscences of our RJC times!

Sue - I wished so badly I could spend time with you in Singapore but sadly I'm not able to make it back...

Faith, Mariko & Pei'En - Folks I would never have gotten to know/ reconnect with if I had not come to the USA

LPY! This post is also specially dedicated to you - It was really nice waking up this morning to your voice... CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR FIRST CLASS HONORS! I couldn't be more proud of you! :) Really very happy for you!

? - to represent people I didn't get to include and also the future friends to come. Emm, maybe bf/ hubby too? Lol! Come on... *winks*

Sometimes distance does make the heart grow fonder. It takes effort to show that you care and look out for one another. :)

Getty Museum - an architectural gem

My friends know that I'm constantly on the go - doing/ learning something or having something that challenges me. I can't sit still and just do nothing. So it literally pained me that the weekend after my CFA exam was somewhat uneventful. I learned that sometimes, people disappoint/ life happens and it's not a good idea to build your house on shaky sand.

The weekend after that (which was last weekend) was pretty neat - Jason finally made it to LA and we went to the Getty Museum last Saturday (19 June) -

It was really nice, and intellectually stimulating with all the stuff I learned about the Renaissance period.

Weekends should be like this! :)

The longest day in the year

June 21 - the first day of the summer solstice. It's really refreshing seeing JC Physical Geography come to life with the 4 seasons in the USA. Today's the longest day in the year - the rest of daylight during summer will just get progressively shorter. Cool.

Today's also Day 3 of my 2 week detox but because I had existing lunch and dinner plans, the detox is not working!! :-( 我必须坚持下去！

Hollywood & Ice Age

Met Jennifer for an awesome visit to the La Brea Tar Pits & George C. Page Museum.

I went to work early (6am) and left early (3pm) and spending time outdoors and in the museum really made me feel like I was on vacation. Very heartening for the senses and soul!

It remains super fascinating to me how different Los Angeles must be 25,000 years ago - when Sabertoothed cats roamed, and Mammoth elephants trooped. I saw all these amazing Sabertoothed cats skulls and their crazy sharp teeth and was literally spellbound that 1) they exist(ed!) and 2) I could see my Childcraft encyclopedia come to life. I didn't even know it was from these tar pits that inspiration for the ICE AGE movies were drawn! But then again, duh...it's not surprising given that Hollywood's just 5 mins away!

On an aside note, today's special for 2 reasons: 1) It marks the start of my 2-week Organic Detox! and 2) You probably aren't reading this, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EDISON!

Effective listening

Interestingly, as I prepare for a meeting tomorrow to discuss tenets of effective listening...I received a revelation: ironically, in order to listen, to understand the other, you have to listen first to yourself. You have to be attentive to your own life experience, own inner world of feelings, needs and dreams, before you can possibly hear someone else's. You are able to understand only if you have registered your own feelings in a similar situation. :)

Ask anyone what he/she is thinking and you will almost always get an answer. Feelings are in a different realm altogether. Ask most people what they are feeling and they'll look at you as though you've accused them and answer, "Nothing, why?" Yet we have feelings all the time, although we might not be aware of them. Our education has trained us to think and taught us to value our opinions and thoughts. Too often our emotional world has been neglected. Until one learns to listen to one's feelings, to put words on them, they exist outside of our awareness. Learn to listen to your feelings and intuition. :-)

The futile attempt

Really? It must be the influence of my dad's famous pigs. I'm not going to be a tofu over this one.

I don't like tofu

So...Guy in question emailed me today, telling me the following:

"My stomach is in knots with no appetite, my mood is very bland and down, and I can't think straight. Unfortunately, this is how I know my feelings for you are very real. I would not be feeling this way if I did not care deeply for you!"

He asked to meet up, to discuss. I'm a big softie (like tofu!) and I know that a typical me would have crumbled and tried to make the guy feel better. But I think it's a lesson I have to learn (and the same lessons truly keep happening to you until you learn them) that you can't take care of everyone's problems, and you just have to stand firm. As much as I don't believe in making one-party decisions, I think this is a call I have to make and trust that it's the best one for the both of us.